Japanese people think gaijin smell awful. Some say it's a buttery smell.

Well, that's pretty accurate. Right now I stink. But there are good reasons for this.

Listen up Japan: take this into consideration before you harshly judge us whiteys:

1. Summer is far too long, too hot and there is no air-con in this (or any other) school.

2. Japanese deodorant doesn't work! It's more like scented water. I'm forced to have the stuff imported.

3. Japanese washing-machines use cold water. What's the point in that?

4. You stink too, so shut up!

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